What the fuck is wrong with me? How did i end up here.. how did i let this happen to myself.. from now and onwards I will make a promise to you guys and myself that the number will only go down.. only down.. :) FAST DAY TOMORROW <3 AND I WILL STAY STRONG TO ANA AND MIA :)
only cheat meals will be the ones my guys take me to expensive dinner places .. lol ;) guess this will push me to put myself more out there =p
been sick for two days with gastritis and have been on medication probably from exessive alcohol consumption and purging but whats going to stop me ? what the point in being in this world anyway if I'm not thin .. I'm so tired.. i keep telling myself that i need to do something about this but then i never do and i just end up telling myself its okay to eat.. and I'm constantly tormented by these two voices inside my head and its literally driving me insane. . i have no one to talk to.. gosh I JUST WANT TO BE SKINNY. why is life so unfair that my best friend has the best metabolism ever and I'm just stuck here under layers of lard. gosh i just want to cut it all off!
bubz.
wish me luck xx
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